May 6 17

The Churchill Arms, Kensington Church Street, W8

Jack Cutforth

The Churchill Arms, Kensington Church Street, W8

Visited: 31 April by JC & JB

Visited this pub for a couple of warm up pints before a barbecue – because it was a glorious 15 degrees overcast day. Most cliches the British people spout about themselves are onanistic self-congratulatory bollocks, but one which is true is that we will have a barbecue in any weather.*

This is one of London’s more well known pubs, on account of the hanging gardens covering the exterior. They’re an impressive, if not overwhelming, sight in summer, but if you think they’re OTT, wait until you see the interior – so much paraphernalia is hanging from the ceiling it feels a bit at times like you’re drinking in an episode of Hoarders.

The pub is named after little-known Prime Minister Winston Churchill, rather than the insurance dog, so it’s probably not unsurprising that the place is covered in Union Jacks, a display of super-patriotism which used to feel harmless and quaint when it was all about baking shows and monetizing old wartime slogans but feels a bit close to the bone now that our actual government’s actual foreign policy is just that speech Prime Minister Hugh Grant makes in Love Actually.

The drinks are affordable for the area and there’s plenty to choose from. Get here early if you want to get a table, and if you’re peckish there’s a restaurant serving Thai food, just like Winston Churchill used to love, maybe.

It’s a proper old fashioned feeling pub, in a good way, and if you don’t think too hard about how much dust must have accumulated on all of that hanging clutter, it’s a good pub to visit, especially if you love flowers.

Beer: 4
Price: 3
Service: 3
Atmosphere: 4

Do they do food? Thai.
Are they in the 21st Century? Well, not emotionally maybe, but they do accept contactless cards with no minimum payment.
Are there dogs? Bulldogs compulsory.
I want to smoke: Stand outside and enjoy the flowers.

*Onanism is a fancy word for tossing yourself off. We pride ourselves on being educational.